Sometimes I like to write headlines like that just to freak out professional writers.
But here is a real email I got from a “gentle reader” (I love to use this Miss Manners term) who said he would be happy to get your input about his situation:
“I came across your site while trying to decide if its right for me
to leave my job right now to pursue a passion of mine since i was a
kid. I’m 23 now, and have worked at this job straight out of college
at 21, and recently was given the opportunity to play semi-pro baseball
in germany. the catch being the team can only pay my rent, so it is a
great opportunity cost to leave. I have a nice chunk of money saved
up, so financially im ok to do this for a summer, but this is a really
good and high paying job that im sure a lot of people would kill to
have right now. this should be an easy choice, because i hate this job
and cannot see myself in not only this job, but this entire field, ever
again. baseball has been my love since i can remember, and this would
be the perfect end of an era for me to say goodbye to my playing days
with this trip, as my job allows me to do basically nothing with my
free time.I noticed you said at one point to quit before your job makes you,
and this has already happened. i was given an action plan that if my
preformance does not impove in 30 days, i will be terminated.
honestly, im in this situation because i just havent tried. i know i
can blow them away with preformance since now i work at about a 20%
motivation level, and them seeing me at 100% would really change their
perspective. but still after the 30 days nothign will change and i
will be back to being miserable.id appreciate any advice you could give me!”
He followed this up with:
“Some more detail if needed – I’m looking to go into a creative
field, possibly writing or something with creative advertising. If not
that, I’ve always also had a passion for business start ups, as i love
troubleshooting the unknown. I know what i want to do, which is more
than I can say about myself than 2 years ago when i first graduated
college, so I am very thankful that i’ve come to this realization. I
also definitely know what I don’t want to do, thanks to the job in
traditional finance I am at now. Part of me is seeing this trip is a
way to break loose. All of my friends are 100% supportive of me taking
this trip, but its my parents who are on the pessimistic side which is
keeping me from diving straight into it.As you can see from this 3:30am email, ive lost a lot of sleep over this decision.Thanks so much for your help!”
Despite all the things I know I should say to be responsible and balanced, my gut reaction to this question is:
Quit the job you loathe and go play ball in Germany!!!
That and read Jonathan Field’s book Career Renegade, out today.
Any more mature/nuanced advice out there?
Dude, Go play ball in Germany!
1. This opportunity will likely never come again.
2. Sports is a young man’s game. The time for a sports career is as close to 21 as possible.
3. You’re 23, unmarried and childless. Other than a roof over your head, you need very little to get by at this point, and I’m sure you can find that once you get to Germany.
4. There will be plenty of time for a desk job later. You may not be able to play ball later.
5. Even if this is the wrong choice, you have plenty of time ahead of you to make up for it.
6. Being a professional ball player is interesting and will look good on your resume. Some people will call you in for an interview just to talk to you because of this.
That’s just off the top of my head. I’m 37.
Dear Career Conundrum,
End your inner turmoil and go to Germany as soon as you can. If you are financially stable at the moment, all the better to make this move now. Your youth is an advantage: there will be few if any opportunities again to make a choice like this as a free agent (no pun here) and you will be adding valuable international experience to your resume. It also sounds as if your diminshing enthusiasm for your current job won’t help you improve your performance reviews from mangement’s perspective. If you play ball overseas and enjoy the creative energy of business start-ups, then why not entertain a future in sports management or media communications for professional/semi-pro teams? Best of luck to you, Phyllis Shabad, ExecutiveBrandCoach.com
Play ball!!!
If you have the money to support yourself for the summer while making rent and doing something you love…then do it.
I’m 34 now … regretting missed opportunities can be rough. Trust me on that one
I’m all for just saying ditch the current job and go play some ball… with one additional item…
… really figure out what you want to do when the baseball career concludes.
Despite saying he knows what he wants to do… it doesn’t seem so clear with the “possibly” this or that… or something else added on.
So, go and enjoy Germany, see and experience the area… and set a goal to figure out what it is that you want to do.
Here’s more nuanced advice from a 55 year old: Quit your job and go play baseball in Germany. Work it out. Do you see a pattern here?
Get your glove and get off the pine!! (it’s Europe even!) You’re 23,, what’s the worst that happens, you get awesome experiences, meet fabulous europeans, get paid to play sports (not well, but paid none the less), and have fun while doing it. If it gets real bad, live there,, wait,, how is living somewhere new and interesting in the least bit bad, especially when you could be stuck at that desk you hate,,,
Did you even have a question? We expect you to check in from Europe, wherever you’re playing when you get there via Pam!
7. Oh yeah, and the economy sucks right now so you might not be able to get a desk job anyway. If you’re worried about your student loans (and you’re in the US) they have a program that lets you not have to pay for a while in times of financial hardship.
I dropped out of graduate school at 24 and joined the circus – LITERALLY. Best thing I ever did.
Please, please, please don’t put yourself in the position ten years from now of wondering “What if. . .”. Listen to everyone here and follow your dream and figure out what to do after while you are there. At your age, you have plenty of time to get back into whatever AFTER the adventure.
(By the way, I met my husband in that circus and we will have been together 29 years Friday. Not such a bad move, huh?)
I’m 35 and finally going after what I’ve wanted to do all my life because I was too busy doing what I was “Supposed To Do” in my twenties. I wish I’d played more. I wish I’d traveled to Europe on a shoestring. I wish I’d done anything except stay in jobs I hated because the money was good, or because I felt like I had to.
Play ball. Seriously. Then find out what you love and pursue it. Opportunities and success will open up for you.
DO IT.
I’m not going to explain the logical aspects, that’s not what I’m good at, and what I need other people for.
People would kill for the job you’re in? Does that make you hate it any less? Get out before it kills YOU.
If you know you’re not cut out for the ratrace, the longer you leave it, trying to be like everyone else, the more it will start to affect you mentally, then maybe physically. I’m stuck in a corporate hole and it’s giving me panic attacks and I’ve been referred for counselling. I’m only 27, and retraining fast.
If you’ve got the chance to do something you LOVE, trust yourself and the people who say that’s what it’s all about. It’s big and it’s scary and it’s not quite logical. One size does not fit all, but this one does fit you.
Definitely go play ball. My 27 year old son took the “safe” route right out of college and while his job is “OK,” he’s now wondering what else is out there that he might be more passionate about!
This is the best time of your life to follow your dreams – who knows where this could lead? Don’t lose any more sleep. Just do it.
And, oh yeah, most parents think it’s their job to be cautious for you. They’re core value is probably security while it sounds like yours is creativity and freedom.
Follow your heart and send us a postcard!
Go play ball – set up a blog and write something every day from now until you get back from Germany – you have ton of material including: playing baseball, Germany and living there, career change. By the time you are ready to come back, your blog will be your resume. Writing the blog will also teach you a lot about who you are and what you really want to do.
Go !!!
If you don’t go I’ll quit MY job and go for you! And I don’t even play baseball!
Seriously though, you’re young, you have the money …. what could possibly go wrong?
Think of the stories you’ll have to tell the young-uns down the line!
GO PLAY BALL!!!!
There will always be mind numbing, soul crushing corporate jobs out there. And with baseball in your background – I guarantee interviews.
I’d give anything (save my kids) for the opportunity to play baseball at any level. Do it for me and all the other corporate drones who can and will live vicariously through you.
Good luck – and hit ‘em where they ain’t.
The short answer: go. The long answer: go now.
Unless you’re extremely lucky in life, you will not have a better opportunity to do this. And I echo what previous commenters have said, learn what drives you along the way, and create a niche for yourself that uses those strengths and talents. You’ll be ready to spring out of the gates on your next life adventure once this one comes to a close.
Don’t go!
Then maybe I can leave my job and take the empty place on the team
Good luck and enjoy yourself!
This should be an easy decision. Former semi-professional ball player in Germany looks mighty fine on a resume or linked-in profile. Think of all the creative types you’ll meet on this trip.
Haven’t you given your notice yet? What’s holding you up? (that’s mature advice from this 53 year old).
I love reading this blog, but this is the first time I’ve commented.
Dear 23 Year Old,
I am you in the future – I wasn’t thrilled with my job right out of college, and after a year, vowed to leave, but I didn’t, and I stayed there 8 years. It was a good job too, one where I made good money and had the respect of peers. I learned a lot, and made some good friends, but when the opportunity came to move overseas, I jumped and left it all behind – found temp homes for my cats, sold my car, lived off my savings and had a great time for 6 months. While I came home to a less-than-stellar job market, I was able to find a job to pay the bills (I’m not in my dream job yet because I’m still trying to figure that out), and I wouldn’t trade anything for that time overseas, living the life of a foreigner. You know you don’t want to be in this field, and leaving this way is a perfect opportunity for you to keep contacts/possible friends because you’re not leaving to find a different/better job; you leaving because an opportunity presented itself that was just too good to pass up. It’s Europe! Germany is awesome! Go! Go already! Get!
OMG, the butter-on-my-bread kinda question.
Bottom line: Go. Don’t look back. And while you’re there, think about how your experience in your current job has the potential to set a lifelong pattern in action. In other words, what do you want to take responsibility for so that the future never looks like it does now?
Okay, so I’m kinda raining on the general parade here, but this is important stuff…!! Answer it, and you’re a genius for the rest of your life.
…I mean “so the future doesn’t look like the past…”
I also say go play baseball! This shouldn’t even be an issue since he was already given a mandate to improve performance at his current job or be terminated. It would be a terrible thing to pass up the offer to play baseball only to lose his job because his performance didn’t improve enough. Even if he kept his job, there is no telling how long he would still be there considering the current state of the economy.
This offer to play baseball could be considered a sign of where he is supposed to go in life. If it doesn’t work out, then he can figure out what he will do next.
To “gentle reader”, Have fun and go rediscover yourself!
Shannon
Guess what? I think you should go.
You are not doing anybody any favors at your current job with your bad attitude. Go do something you love for a while. Get some international perspective. You’ll come back (or stay there – who knows?) with a fresh outlook.
Also, maybe it will help your parents have peace if you tell them that you now realize you sabotaged your career (you did, dude) and you promise to contemplate that –while you PLAY BALL! Unless you owe them a bunch of money, be respectful but don’t let them stop you.
By the way – what are you when you are in the men’s room in Germany? European!!
Definitely go… I love the idea of blogging the experience. I’m sure you’ve got lotsa fans who would want to read up on you. I would!
Might be a good time for you to start your own thing while you’re in Germany. Blogging would be the best!
You can get a job when you get back if it all goes down the crapper.
Dale
corporatepreneur.blogspot.com
Once they’ve threatened to fire you, you’re already fired. Why wait for the official notice?
It’s unanimous. Don’t give it another thought. Go. Enjoy the summer, play a little ball, and think a bit about what you want to do when you grow up.
My wife started a new career at the age of about 43. I started my new career at 45. Don’t be afraid to change. Be afraid to be stuck doing what you hate.
I meant to add that my wife and I are now 50 and enjoying our new careers.
P.S. I’m not just telling you to go. I’m hoping my own kids will take this advice and do what their heart tells them, not what they think their brain is telling them. Brains are stupid.
Go! Go now. If you don’t go, your friends/family should kidnap you and send you off to play ball.
There are chances we only get once in our lives, this would be one of them. Go and do not look back. The life you lead in Germany will give you the creative worldly outlook you’ll need when you get back.
I can’t believe you’re even having to consider this.
Please, for the love of all that is holy, GO and go quickly.
It will never be easier than it is right now to go do something like this.
You are at a perfect stopping point. If you are leaving a job you hate anyway, you don’t have to worry about “picking up where you left off.”
And with a story like playing ball in Germany, nobody in your NEXT chosen industry is going to care that you weren’t traditionally employed for a while.
I just don’t see what you have to lose by going.
Please, please go.
Two quotes stayed with me when I quit my job to start my own business:
1) “Leap, and the net will appear.”
You will never know the opportunities that will come your way because you took this baseball job. But trust me, if doing this is what you really want, they will come to you. They just will, and I’m not talking about some cosmic Secret stuff. This is just what happens. It happened to me, it happened to everyone I know who has ever taken the step you’re about to take. Leap because you WANT to. When you begin to do what you’ve always wanted to do, good things happen. They can’t NOT happen, because this is where all of your energy and passion is. This will lead to another thing, and you’ll look back on today feeling so GRATEFUL you listened to all of us.
But don’t listen to us! Or to Pam! Take it from the dead philosopher Goethe. And hang this up on your wall and memorize it. This will become your mantra:
“Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back. Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is one elementary truth that ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamed would have come his way. Whatever you can do, or dream you can do, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it. Begin it now.”
A dream latched onto me like a blood-sucking leach when I was a senior in high school: Go live in Spain.
Through jobs and loans, I did it! At age 22, I left the US and studied in Madrid, overstaying the international program’s 9 months by an extra five…on my own time and dime.
I came back to the US with $20 in my bank account. When you’re young, you can recoup the financial investment. I not only paid off all of my loans, I now have incredible memories of experiences that are priceless to me, and that continue to entertain me decades after my wonderful Spanish adventures.
As you probably can tell, I encourage you to go to Germany and be the very best baseball player you can. Strive for excellence. Throw your passion into your new “job”, and give it 120%.
Advice: If you may find that you’ll return to the US, make contingency plans NOT to move in with your parents to get back on your feed, if needed. I did that; wished I had made other plans.
When a young person spends 6 months, or 14 months in Europe, s/he comes back a different person. Your parents will still see you as the same person they knew the day before you flew to Germany.
Oh, and purchase Rosetta Stone to learn German. The Germans love to speak English, however, if you really strive to speak their language, you’ll earn their respect even more.
Start that blog, let Pam know the URL, and I’ll look forward to reading about your adventures!
Go for it NOW!
Now is the time to do the things you really enjoy. Who knows what it might lead to – it is bound to take you in exciting new directions and help you decide on your future career. You might discover an opportunity that you don’t even know exists at the moment.
Enjoy it!
Go and do it. But be warned: Germany is not the nicest place to be. The weather is bad and lots of people are grumpy just about everything. It is a secure place, though, lots of culture and loads of opportunities.
Go and chase your dreams!!
Dear Pam and gentle Reader!
Well – I´m not sure if this is any help – I think that the baseball club is all support that you will need to have a nice summer here.
However – if there are other questions regarding Germany/living here I´m willing to try to answer them or direct you to people that might be able to.
I´m living aroung the “Ruhrgebiet” area which is in the middle of Germany, so gentle reader – if you are interested and Pam is so kind the contact could be established through her.
Kind regards Rahel
I agree with everyone else, go play baseball. You do not want to be 40, in a job/career you hate and full of regrets. Playball, explore Europe and have fun.
DO NOT HESITATE, JUST GO!
You will not regret it, you will have amazing experiences that will help you further define your creative career whatever that may be (photography, writing, whatever…) Pick up 4HourWorkWeek and some other great books anyone here can recommend and split your “free time” in Europe having fun and figuring your future after baseball out. The opportunity to do that in a totally new environment will change your perspective on a lot of things. I can guarantee, you won’t starve or go homeless and something like this will be much harder to do in 10 years than it is now. Please go. I’m sure everyone commenting here that never did such a thing and wanted to wishes they would have a similar opportunity. And keep us posted.. start a blog, take lots of pictures.
Gentle Reader,
Hmmm, let’s see…
Give your notice at work.
Pack.
Go play ball.
Have the time of your life.
Blog about this once-in-a-lifetime experience.
Have your mom and dad read this one. (I’d bet in their hearts they want you to go – and they worry – because that’s what we parents do).
I was 35 before I finally started doing what I love (owning my own business) – but it’s not my ultimate dream (it is, however, what will get me there).
My dad wanted me to be a lawyer, my mom wanted me to be a teacher. I dabbled in both. I was miserable.
End your misery now and GO.
And promise you’ll send a picture of you in your uniform to Pam to post.
Cheers,
~ A
I’m Swiss and play baseball here. We usually have one American coming over to play for us and
NOT ONE regretted doing it.
Yes, you don’t make money. But the experiences you make are worth a lot more. Some of the guys playing for us said the experience changed their life.
Here’s another voice in the “Go” column. Two of the coolest grownups I know are able to say:
a) I was a trapeze artist in the circus and
b) I danced with Alvin Ailey after college.
I’m going to rain on this parade of joy….
If it sounds too good to be true, it usually is. (Remind anyone of a current fiscal crisis?)
Mom and dad may just be grumps who don’t want their boy to have any fun. Or maybe they have a different message that this young man does not want to hear, and is not telling us.
Perhaps they see a young man that could have done well in college, IF he’d applied himself. Maybe they see a young man who really didn’t want to find a job, but did, and now isn’t putting forth much effort, though he is being paid for it. (He admits to a 20% commitment – that is about 1 hour of worth per day).
I’d offer him TWO pieces of advice -
1) Before you go, decide: Is it really to play ball, or is it to escape cubicle hell? It’s only for a summer, so it’s no big loss if you spend most of it on the bench and are miserable because you don’t speak the language and everyone treats you like an outsider.
2) Admit the truth: you’ve already decided to go – you are just shopping for confirmation that its OK to cut and run. So make sure you realize this is just another Disneyland vacation, not the reality of making a living. While you are gone, REALLY decide what you are going to be when you become an adult. How can you support yourself AND give fair value to an employer AND be happy? How will you assure your children get the advantage of a college education – as you did?
Because you haven’t found your sweet spot in REALITY yet.
You AREA at the age to go do crazy stuff like this. Yes, it can look good on your resume.
But you are also old enough to start making real FORWARD LOOKING decisions and plans, not just run away from what makes you unhappy.
Enjoy the vacation, but realize what it is – escape from job mistake #1 (or #2? or #3? we don’t really know from this one-sided picture, do we?).
Play ball!!
My life is far from over, but at 34, I feel I missed my opportunity to do all the crazy, exciting adventures I chickened out on in my early 20s.
Do it. You WILL regret it for the rest of your life if you don’t.
If you like writing, test the waters by starting a blog about your adventure. I’d read it!
Leave this week and don’t look back. After your basket ball tenure is over look for some jobs in Europe and travel for the rest of 2009. The US job market won’t have any decent recovery until 2010. You are young and not committed do this NOW. I only wish I had this opportunity at 23. I’m 34 and married and stayed with jobs I hated and still do b/c of life responsibilities. If these comments don’t influence you go pick up the book “The Five Secrets You Must Discover Before You Die”. There is a quote from the book that has stayed with me, and I paraphrase “When asked if you should take this opportunity, imagine yourself at 80 years old sitting on a porch looking back at past decisions, would you have regretted not doing something”
I think you know the answer.
Good luck!
I too believe you should go, but I have one additional thought to add. You need to make this decision, not just to avoid lifelong regret, but to finally grow up. Allowing yourself to be negatively influenced by your parents (or anyone else, really, myself included) is far more of a serious issue than the job or the dream. What will happen when you tell them you’re going to freelance or be an entrepreneur? You think it’s bad now, just wait until you aren’t married by the time they think you should be…nothing pretty comes of this approach. You can respect your parents’ love for you the most by doing what makes you happy. This is all any parent truly wishes for their child. Go, have fun, and step up to your life – it’s time.
Good luck and book your flight!
Vicki Flaugher
@Smartwoman on Twitter
Gentle Reader:
Divinly you are being nudged to seek a passion of yours. It’s called a gut feeling. You already know this is for you. Go, and enjoy every freakin second of it.
Your parents will be just fine.
I’ve just finished reading all 43 comments and I’m inspired to go pack my bags and go play ball in Germany with you!
There is so much wisdom and experience in the words that everyone has shared here AND it should have no bearing on whether or not you go. It doesn’t matter how many people tell you should quit your job and follow your dream. What matters is YOU make the decision that you know in your heart to be true.
I’m sure it feels fabulous to receive all this support and encouragement, but honestly, you don’t need it. Like Art said earlier, “You’ve already made your decision.”
The job is baseball.
The place is Germany.
The time is now.
Go play your dream!
P.S. Germany is a wonderful place and certainly doesn’t have any more grumpy people than the U.S. does.
Go to Germany and play ball! I’m 58 years old and very happy about the way my life has turned out, but one of my biggest regrets is that I didn’t defy my father, when I was 18 years old in 1968 and had just graduated high school, and go to Texas to take the training to be a stewardess. I was too afraid, growing up in a small redneck NW USA town. It would have given me the chance to travel and see the world when I was young and footloose and fancy free. I now urge young people to branch out and do something totally different while they are young. Plus, it sounds like the writing is on the wall on your job. The 30-day thing actually sounds like they are looking for a way to get rid of you anyway. In this day of downsizing, it’s not so much the talent they’re interested in as looking for someone who’s willing to give 200% of their energy and life for 50% of the pay, and you sound way too adventurous and smart to do this. Who knows what the baseball short-time career could lead to? You just might find your career passion in Germany while you’re experiencing life. You might have to wash dishes to pay for food while you’re there. So what? The world situation is pretty scary to your parents, I’m sure, and parents are also, a lot of times, looking at the passion they themselves missed a chance at to preserve their security and subconsciously resent their child who is presented with the same opportunity. Things always turn out for the best, so I’m not saying that if you don’t take this opportunity, your life will be ruined. I have a great life and I’m really happy, even though I didn’t take my opportunity when I was young. But that chance to travel the world AND get paid for it has always rankled and has led me to some behaviors I might not have done had I followed my passion when I had the chance, i.e., disastrous first marriage, substance abuse lifestyle (I now am sober 25 years and have a career, which I’m also less than thrilled with, but luckily I don’t have to work so I have the freedom to choose not to….lol). Anyway, I know this is long, but I wanted to present a bit of the whole story. Please follow your heart and take the chance. Promise your parents you’ll never ask them to support you, if that’s what they are worried about. I think you’ll probably end up far richer materially for having followed your passion than for having stayed in something you abhor. Deadening your spirit for security comes at a price. Best luck, and I hope you keep us posted on your progress!!
It takes more courage to walk away from a “safe” choice than it does to stay in it – whether you are miserable or not isn’t relevant – except that it helps make your choice easier if you ARE unhappy.
If you have truly examined your heart and you KNOW you aren’t running away FROM something as much as running TOWARD something, consider this opportunity the Universe’s answer to the question you’ve carried in your heart most of your life.
Do not even take your current negative situation at work into account here. If you go, and play ball, other opportunities will arise for you – possibly in the same vein. If not, it will give you time to decide what your next move will be when you come home.
And prep yourself for the trip as much as possible! Learn some language and customs, talk to people who have lived in Germany. I find people of a nation are much more welcoming when they see you have made an effort to learn about THEM, instead of playing the Ugly American.
Plus, you already have $ to live on – very smart of you to have saved it. No matter how the situation turns out – even if you find you don’t like everything that happens when you are there, you will still have the joy of NO WHAT IF’S – 10, 20, 50 years from now. Believe me, there is nothing worse than woulda, shoulda, coulda!
That alone would send me on the trip!
Go to Germany and play baseball. You will regret it for the rest of your life if you don’t.
Like most of the other comments, I say “Go for it.” You really have nothing to lose except a mediocre job and a life you don’t love.
At almost 44, the only things I regret are the ones where I didn’t take a deep breath and jump when I had the opportunity.
There will be a better job waiting for you when you get done playing baseball. As the old adage goes, “fortune favors the brave”.
Spending a summer backpacking by myself around Europe in 1990 (and chopping a piece off the Berlin Wall in the process) after grad school was still one of the best things I ever did, even though I had to work temp jobs for almost a year afterward because the economy sucked then, too. Now, I have a small business and can work around my life.
You will be fine. Working in Germany and traveling will give you perspectives and opportunities that you can’t even imagine now. While you are there, network, network, network. Your passion is baseball–look at your skills (the ones you gained from college and working) and see if there’s some way to parlay them into a job in baseball after your playing days are over…
Couple of things…
Pam, the next time you present one of these, please don’t tell us your answer first. I wonder if the advice would have been so one-sided if you hadn’t share your gut?
It’s easy to jump on a happy bandwagon and cheer with the crowd. It interests me that so many have used his young age as one of the reasons why he ought to go. I wonder how many are then using an older age as a reason not to play or risk into an unproven area?
That said. I agree with the majority. Please go play ball. I like the idea to journal your experience and leverage it somehow. I’m 58 and I played rugby until I was 45, for no pay, just for joy. One of the best experiences ever was traveling to the Caribbean just to play rugby. Go – play and live!